What's a Girl to do? Argh!!!!

Have you ever been put in a position where you damned if you do and damned if you don't. Today, that is how I feel. I want and need a vacation more than anything. A vacation where I can really relax. You know the kind, get up when I want, sit by the pool and eat dinner at 8:00. All summer I have been looking forward to this vacation. It has been a beacon, a light at the end of a long tunnel. And because of the usual financial stresses I saw the light growing dimmer. Alas, I was feeling dismayed. Long story, short. I was given the option that if we could not go on my "dream" vacation that provision would be made for me and the boys. Of course I would have to make arrangements for my honey. I knew, in my heart of hearts, my husband would come to the rescue and find a way for us to go, but it was not before we had the very unpleasant conversation that turned into a major blow up. One like I can't remember. So I ask, what's a girl to do? I, of course, need to stand by my husband. And I will. Yet, my vacation is almost medicinal at this point. I can't be with out it. So if I go, it is with an unhappy husband who is going begrudgingly (albeit grinning and bearing it). If I don't go, well I can't even think of that option, let's just say Mom will be a very unhappy camper. There are times I just hate being a grown up. Argh!!