It's Over

Grandma's long, courageous battle is finally over. The Lord has finally brought her into his fold. Carole, my mother-in-law said she went peacufully in her sleep as she had prayed for. Now is the hard part. The missing part. I already feel the emptiness, and I didn't see her often because we live so far away. I can only imagine what Carole is feeling. The good news is she has a terrific support group of people who have surrounded her with love and support and are holding her hand every step of the way. I look forward to giving her a hug.

As for the kids, Jim, as always, was so sweet. He was gentle with the boys as he explained to them. They clearly understood. Then David gave his Dad a hug. It was tremendous. Tom, being a boy of what's next, asked when is the funeral. It's amazing what kids can handle and how well they do. I love them.

How did my Mom do it?

How can two boys who kiss and hug each other one minute wrestle the next? I know my Mom said my sister and I fought like crazy (ok I also remember), and now we are best friends. The question is how do the boys live to become friends? How do I survive? I decided to do some research and found a cool website and an article on Why Siblings Fight. I hope you enjoy it. I plan on reading it over and over till I figure something out. It's either that or some really strong Duct Tape.

The Plan - For What It's Worth

Well I heard it again yesterday at a Toastmaster's Officer's training meeting - First you must create then plan and then you must work the plan. Hmm. Sounds good.

The Plan - When School Starts (yipee - can you see me dancing)

• Get back on track with God no matter what the distractions.
  
• Work the equivalent of three full days - work around kids school schedule.
• Organize the house and declutter - get help from Organize it All.
• Get bills organized and a budget - we have big goals that depend on this.
• Have at least 3 hours of "me" time a week - the hardest one to visualize.

The Goal - The Why
When I do all that I say that I am going to do, I will reap the benefits of:

• A cluttered free mind and home.
• A spiritual awakening and joy once again.
• Security and bent toward the future.
• Peace of mind.

Consider it done - or as it might be said "make it so."

Since I Gave Up, God Took Over

Thanks God. Today I can say that I rode out that storm. It was brief and turbulent, and in the end all survived. A bit wounded, but not life threatening. What I have learned is that I cannot do it all. I need to ask for help, sooner. I need to create time for me, sooner. I mean it needs to get on my calendar first and then fill in appointments. I also learned that meetings out side the home does not count as "me" time. I also learned that God can't help me until I am ready. Thank you.

Okay, I give up!!!

Last night I hit the wall. It has been a difficult week. Although my performance in my sales career has been excellent, my personal life just went crazy. On Monday my kids had a bad hair day and they weren't going alone. Apparently while they were at camp, when they weren't in time out, they were terrorizing the other little campers. Let's just say an incident report needed to be filled out. I get a call to come and get them and by they way they might not be welcome back. Then came Tuesday. This is a day that I normally have a weekly training from 8:00 to 11:00. What I thought was a reliable sitter turned out not to be as reliable as I needed. Okay, she has not been dependable in the past, but I had no one else (my bad) so I counted out her. Well, we must have had what we call "mutual mystification" because she never came and she did not think she was supposed to be there. That was different from my understanding. Needless to say, I was beside myself, which is hard to do. On top of that I don't have air conditioning and it was hot, really hot.

So at 12:00 in the morning, after my kids woke up for more water, I could not go to sleep. My mind was racing. My life seemed hopeless. I was making plans (okay, I'm being dramatic). I literally got out of bed so I wouldn't wake Jim up with my crying. He woke up and came down and just sat with me and we had a very incoherent conversation through my tears and then I could sleep. But poor Jim now was awake. He eventually went to sleep.

The sun rose and it was a new day. I cleared my mind and decided I was going to take charge so I had a pow wow with the boys about what they would do in camp today. I knew they would comply, after all the alternatives were not pretty. I went to work and had a great day doing what I love to do. I set up my plan for child care for Tuesday's and Thursday (starting next Tuesday). I took the boys to the game room at the mall and got them popcorn. We had a fun dinner and went to VBS.

Yes, today was a much better day. My mind was clear and I was able to channel my resources to develop and implement a plan. Thanks for the morning.